My english is usually good but I am going back and forth here on the blackberry without spell check wondering if there is a "h" in Sandwich...I will take the risk of getting it wrong this time.
This week I was doing a training session on giving and receiving feedback and one of the aha moments for the folks I was with was that the old encouragement sandwich is a fluffy disastrous strategy in communication.
Like many others I have attended the seminar that the "love sandwich" is something good to aim for when approaching difficult conversations. By this I mean the encouraging word followed by the critique finished by another nicety.
The problem with this strategy is that most of us know it is a scam and an approach from people who are afraid of speaking the truth in love.
It is a much better strategy to pause and consider the feedback you want to give someone and consider the desired outcome of the communication. If you hope that the person can learn a more effective manner of behaving then be prepared to demonstrate the benefits while sharing the content.
This is a way to get beyond any form of negative feedback. Feedback is more effective when positive, but only some take the patience to learn how to do it.
If you discover in the process that you are not committed to the person's development whom you are giving feedback I would suggest spending more time developing yourself as the agitation may be of more learning to you personally.
Final considerations: If you find yourself using flowery language in your communication, loop back around and ask yourself what aspect of courage do you need to say what you really mean in a manner that will hit the mark and affect positive change.
Recent Comments